Hello, dear conscious parent
Children don’t trust us automatically. Nobody does.
If you find yourself feeling frustrated, scared or confused because your child doesn’t trust you, you are not alone. Most children do not trust their parents because trust takes work to build and maintain.
There are 3 elements necessary for Trust to exist in a relationship:
- Psychological Safety
- Knowledge/ Expertise
- Consistency
Naturally, most parents have knowledge and expertise about how life works, and have no trouble becoming that source of authority and information for their child. This dimension of trust is easy to establish, especially when children are young. However, most parents have a hard time to maintain psychological safety and consistency because they haven’t done their work on triggers and self-awareness.
How to Improve Psychological Safety:
- become aware of how you feel when you get triggered by your child
- learn to pause for few seconds in between trigger and response
- learn Listening tools for connection when your child is emotionally distressed
- find a listening partner so you can offload feelings of overwhelm on a weekly basis
- create a support system around you so you don’t feel alone and isolated – parenting is hard!
- pay attention to the dynamic between you and your partner; if there is tension or conflict, your child will not feel safe
- work with a coach or therapist if you lose your temper often.
How to Improve Consistency:
- stay consistent with important limits
- learn to set limits with empathy
- keep your word and your promises
- create predictability through routines and rituals.
(in mom’s words, no edits):
“When I initially connected with Mihaela in June, I was not sure what to expect. I was trying to heal from a difficult divorce from a narcissist, dealing with the aftermath of broken pieces, all while trying to keep it together for my 5 year old daughter. I didn’t know how to handle the extreme aggressive outbursts, excessive tantrums, and what seemed like disrespectful disobedience coming from my baby. I felt defeated and not equipped enough to handle it.
Working with Mihaela made me realize that those episodes were my daughter’s cries for help. She is feeling the effects of the divorce as well and so young that she doesn’t know how to handle it. Mihaela has been amazing. She has challenged me to see things from a different perspective. She has helped me to realize a lot of the frustration or anger I was experiencing from others is just a mirror of what work I need to do, but most importantly she has helped me create a stronger bond with my daughter. I have learned better ways to deal with my emotions which in turn helps me to help my daughter with hers.
She is tough, but in the best way possible, because she is doing her job. She does not sugar coat. She is firm in her beliefs and stands 100% confident in her work, especially since she has been through it and done it herself. She is intelligent, challenging, thought provoking, caring, passionate, and supportive.
I highly recommend Mihaela and her conscious parenting program. Thank you, Mihaela for your continued support and guidance! Words cannot express enough the value you have provided to me and my daughter! ”
Become a Founding Member of my program today- I am accepting 10 new parents at a special price. Read below what my clients say about the program:
