The Greater Good Science Center at the University of California, Berkeley identifies GRATITUDE as one of the keys to human well-being, alongside:
- social connection
- and diversity.
There are many studies, books and techniques that inform parents on how to raise grateful kids, from writing a gratitude journal together to having a gratitude jar in the house, to expressing gratitude out loud every morning, or every evening. These practices work and they create healthy belief systems (lenses) in children from an early age.
A gratitude-oriented family imprints in a child’s mind that he/ she:
- is worthy of receiving
- is generous and can give back to others
- is a part of something greater than themselves
- can enjoy the small things in life
- can notice the “present moment”
- can appreciate the awe of nature – always available to us
- can bounce back after a hardship (resiliency).
I truly believe that gratitude is not something that “we do”, but something that WE ARE. It starts with us, parents, to embody this quality in the way we are: every day, day by day, forever and ever. For me, this means that:
- I pay attention to my own body and mind; I bring myself to “here and now” when I get caught in endless judgements about the past, or worries about the future;
- I say Thank You to my son many times a day, for small and big things;
- I say Thank You to people around me, including strangers;
- I refrain myself from criticizing or judging others;
- I offer compliments to others without expecting anything in return;
- I accept people and events as they are right now, without attempting to change anybody ( *this is a hard one for many of us, but it’s worth working on it every day);
- I am learning to receive without reciprocating ( at least not at the same time);
- I give and help others only when I feel it in my heart; not out of obligation or others’ expectations;
- I am good to myself: I forgive myself when I mess up; I show self-compassion; I ask for help; I remind myself that I AM GOOD ENOUGH.
Modeling gratitude will always get better results than teaching gratitude, would you agree? Happy Thanksgiving!
From Angry & Exhausted to Present & Connected
NOV. 30, 12PM EST
This webinar is for you especially if:
- you have children under 12 years of age
- you are divorced (divorcing) and are co-parenting
- your ex is high-conflict and co-parenting is difficult
- you are struggling with shame or guilt as a mom
Parenting is hard and isolating. In this webinar, I will share my ABC Formula to go from angry to calm in the middle of the storm, and share connection-based tools to build the family you want.
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